Reflection for today(How I can do blogging with my second language, English with consistency)

Hello guys😋

So delight to see you agian💕

I haven't done and posted my last blog however today,

I just wanna talk in casual about my honest thoughts and true reflection while starting this writings and bloggings.

I am a Korean, born and raised in Korea. I spent an year in Australia during my high school period and travelled a lot but that doesn’t mean I can speak English as much comfortable as I can speak Korean.

In terms of speaking, it’s better. But when it comes to Writing, it is always not easy.

Actually, I couldn’t notice that much of the difficulties before I started this English blog.

"Then, why have I started this struggling journey?!"

So, I started Korean blog and very enjoyed it.

I liked to talk about what I like and share it with other people.

The fact that I can talk as much as I want, no need to care about listeners if they’re gonna like it or not, and actually some people(or a few) like my stories.

Those were how I felt from blogging.

Since I’m staying in Canada and planning to be here for a long time, I wanted to share my stories and interests with people in Canada.

That is the reason why I started this English blog.

Struggles

At first, I thought it would be not that difficult.

As I’m already writing Korean blogs, I thought,

‘I can just write a Korean blog, let the translator rewrite it in English version.

All I need to do is just upload it! Boom! Two birds with one stone😆.’

However, you know,

Life never goes as you planned haha.

Me, an useless perfectionist,

who wants to be perfect, but just picky in reality..

(I just become a nonsense perfectionist only when I believe I create something🤨)

could not trust a translator so ended up spending three times more on translating and correcting the English expressions than just on writing the content itself.

After 2 blog posts, I could easily notice that I would not be able to continue this process without getting exhausted and eventually give up

I needed to reflect on what the problem was, how I could deal with it to help me enjoy and continue the process of blog posting.

What I have practiced and learnt for last few years of meditation life

Before I share with you how I found a solution for consistently achieving my blogging goals, I would like to share my experiences of learning about

- How I could wisely set a goal and achieve it

- How I could make myself not to feel frustration but to always feel successful

- How I can be consistent with what I am doing right now

We’re going back to December, 2019.

After graduating from college, I tried to find a job in Canada as a step towards future immigration. However, at the time, I was feeling unwell, so I went back to Korea to get checked out. I couldn't imagine that there was something wrong with my health.

I had a medical check-up and found out that my health was in a quite bad situation. I had to undergo a gallbladder removal surgery. This surgery is not usually serious, and most people recover and get back to their normal life soon after. However, I had probably been ignoring my body's alerts for too long.

My health condition did not return to its pre-surgery state, and as I became weaker, more hidden problems started to surface.

At that point, I had difficulty accepting my reality.

I was not able to engage in any outdoor activities for more than 4-6 hours. I could not handle a full-time job, full-time study, travel, or even meet friends for an extended period of time. So, that was the time when I must start giving up on things one by one.

I had to give up my dream of going back to Canada and being fully independent, doing whatever I wanted to do as much as I wanted. (even what I enjoy and have fun with)

At first, I felt like it was the end of my life.

I felt that it was so meaningless to live like that.

As time went by, I was be able to accept my condition a little by little.

While the period of learning how to give up my impossible desires and accept my reality,

I could reflect on my whole life.

I realized that I had been ALWAYS wanting more and more, and was never satisfied with what I had. My ideal for my life and myself was tooo high. The reason why I had never been grateful or happy, no matter what situation I was in, was because of my unrealistic desires for something that was unattainable.

I had no other choice but to accept my reality, and it turned out to be a turning point in my life.

As I let go of my desires, I began to appreciate the things that I already had.

And I learned, ‘Maybe life is not about seeking something, but realizing that what I actually have is already perfect. Perhaps I should focus on what I can do, rather than what I want to do.’

Back to the basic

Why I’m telling you this long story is because it is really a life philosophy.

Every time I feel that something is not going well, I find myself trying to do more than I can handle at that moment, driven by my greed. When I look back on myself and condition and identify what I CAN realistically manage, it becomes not only easier but also more efficient and even possible for me to be consistent.

Finally speaking of writing this English blog(..haha it took long time to coming back),

I'm trying to go back to where I started from.

From years of experiences, I learnt if I want to do something constantly(not just do for a while with an over-ambitious pace and then give up), I should set a goal as much as I am possible to manage. Even if it may feel insufficient at first, with some time and practice, you will be able to do more and do it better as time goes by.

Life philosophy is really always very simple and straightforward.

So, back to basics.

My original goal when starting my blog was twofold:

1.to write about things I can naturally encounter in my daily life.

(such as my experiences with meditation and sharing about nice cafes)

2.to set a goal for how often I would post or how much time I would spend writing each week, as much as I can continue every week.

When I started my Korean blog, my first writing took 6 hours(or even more).

As time went by, it got faster and I was able to post one blog every week.

Now, I have to accept my reality that writing in English and checking grammar is not easy and takes quite a long time more than I expected.

That is the reality.

No matter how much I want to do more, I can not easily shorten the time at once.

So, I am setting a new, more manageable goal for myself.

Posting 1 Korean blog and 1 English blog in a month.

The most important thing is that I never give up and continue to do.

If I keep doing it, I will get used to it, become better over time, and I can write more things in same amount of time.

I believe so and it is actually true as far as I experienced.

Conclusion

You always find the problem and answers from within you.

Actually what is good about it is that you know, you can’t change the world or other people but you may be able to change yourself.

And if you can find the problem within you, that means that you can solve it by yourself.

Isn’t is hopeful?!

Of course, you need a WAY to solve it.

For me, it was Meditation, the method of throwing away your problematic mind.

(Which was greed and desires in my case)

I’m not sure if any of you have your own problem solving method.

If you don’t have, I’ll let you know!

It is always the easiest when you learn from the expert.😎

Alright!

That’s it for today.

I’ll reconfirm and grammar check for today’s writing but not too much in detail.

So, sorry for my insufficiency(I don’t even know if this word is adequate haha).

However I will improve by time and it can be very fun to watch someone growing, right?!

(Please say so..)

Hope and wish and pray to see you all again, very soon.

Love you!😘